Wednesday, December 26, 2007

the bud

so i finally googled bud and the first sites was to a a company called budweiser that i think sells beer.

Official Budweiser beer site containing Anheuser-Busch history, commercials, screensavers, and product information. - 7k - Cached - Similar pages - Note this

i kno the name sounds familiar so i checked in my fridge and my mom keeps a 30 pack of budweisers in there always. i asked her why she buys 30 and she said because thats the largest amount they make. anyway i will give tommy my moms bud tomorrow so that we can be friends and he will help me get back at bobby swanson.

the holiday

tommy and mom and i had christmas last night and opened our gifts. i only asked for one thing this year and that was a american gladiator full figurine set. instead i got a gallon of milk and some cinamen toast crunch. i think the milk was bad because it was wrapped in the present pile for a whole week. mom gave cousin tommy a $300 giftcard to the gap. i asked mom where santa was this year because i didnt get my presents and she said that santa died in a horrible slay accident. i cried for about 2 hours.

tommy asked me again about bud. my mom made me go to bed before i could google it so i dont know what it is yet but i am going to find out. i think that if i can get whatever it is for tommy we can be friends and he will help me with my plans with bobby swanson.

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

the cousin

tommy got here today. he wears really baggy pants and has an earing and a gold neklass and a tattoo. i think that he shaves because he has a sweet mustash. he is only 11. whenever he talks to me instead of saying my name he says homes. like… yo homes or whats cracking homes. i really dont understand much of what he is talking about but i pretend i do.

i asked tommy about california and he said they had awesome bud there. im not sure what bud is but i didnt want to sound stupid so i said that i loved bud more than i love anything in the world (except nitro). then he asked if i could get him some and i didnt know what to say. so i just said sure.

tonight after he goes to bed im going to google bud to see exactly what it is and where i can get it.

Monday, December 24, 2007

the message

im not sure where bobby is but he still hasnt been back to school. we are on holiday break right now so i guess i will have to wait until the new year to follow thru with my plans. im not sure if this has anything to do with my plans but i got this message on AIM a few days ago and i saved it to post it here...

xbs1x: i no it wuz u
xbs1x: when i get bak u r goin 2 pay
xbs1x: bigtime
kidnitro96: im not sopposed to talk to strangers on the internet my mom told me that chris hansen on msnbc cant catch all of the boy lovers in the world
xbs1x signed off at 12:39:23 PM.

im not sure who that was. i hope mr hansen catches him.

my cousin tommy is coming to live with us for a couple weeks becuz my uncle got in a shootout with the cops. he gets in later today. tommy is my age but lived in california for his whole life in a place called compton. i wonder if we will be friends.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

the update

my power went out for the last week because my mom said she forgot to pay the bill. but then she took the elektrisity man into her room and had a talk with him (for 25 minutes) and he turned our lites back on. she is so smart.

bobby got out of jail last week but hasnt been back to school yet. i think that when he gets back i will still try to do everything else on my list to him. we have holiday break from school coming up on friday so i have to act fast before the new year. i am going to try to make him and his family think that they won a million dollars because they are really poor. i think that will teach him and i also think thats what nitro would do if he were me.

i also heard from some kids in school that american gladiators is coming back on tv with new shows. that is the best news i have ever heard since i found out i wasnt going to die from an overdose of flinstones vitamins. i hope nitro comes back and kicks everyones backsides to china.

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

the plan pt. 2

well i tried my plan and it didnt go like i thought it would. here is what happened…

that morning i tried to pp in nitro but it didnt work because i peed the bed that night and i couldnt make any more potty. i was very mad but then i remembered i tried my moms brown drink before that she keeps on top of the icebox (it looks like pp). it tasted exactly like pee. i know because i have tasted pee before because bobby held me down and peed in my mouth once! i dont know why my mom would keep such a gross drink in the house but i figured it would probably have the same affect as pee on a human.

i put a lot of my moms brown drink in nitro. that morning i got on the bus and went to school and then to the lunch room. bobby was already sitting with his best friend (who lives in a trailer with his 8 brothers and sisters) named billy. there is a rumor going around the town that his dad has entercorse with his horses but i dont believe everything i see on youtube.

anyway i managed to get to bobbys oj after i placed a $10 bill i stole from my mom on the ground right by the lunchroom window and they both saw it. they ran after it and faught eachother for the $10 while i dumped nitro into his drink. after they were done fighting billy was crying and lieng on the ground. bobby ran inside to eat the rest of his breakfast really fast because he knew the principle was coming to get him. a crowd of kids and teachers was coming outside to see what was going on.

bobby drank his drink really fast and ate his breakfast when the pinrsiple got to the lunch room. i was very sad because bobby didnt even seem to notice the pee in his oj. i was ready to give up on my plan when the most amazing thing happened.

30 minutes later i was walking to my next class and i went outside and police mens were all over! i ran to see what was going on and they had bobby on the ground and sprayed him with mase right in his eyes! bobby started screaming for the cops to go to h e duble hockey sticks, and then one of the poliece men took out a club and hit him in his face!! i was so eksited that i almost threw up (i do that when i get eksited sometimes).

they took bobby to the polise cars and threw him in there. i asked the prinsiple what happened and he said bobby had “ingested alcohol” (i had to google that for the spelling). he said that bobby could go to jail. then i threw up all over the principle. that night when i went home id dint even mind my mom hitting me with her high heels in my head because i took her $10 and her brown drink. it was very worth it.